Episode 105

April 30, 2012 § Leave a comment

The Life Of Walsh Episode 105:

I guess you can tell a lot about a person by their car. My car… it has…. character. I have a history with bad cars, senior year of high school I was voted biggest lemon car in the mock elections. Aside from that, I like to name things, everything. In my life, inanimate objects have personalities.

My phone is Delores, my ipad is Henry, my ipod is Cricket, my external hard drive is Slim Jim, my computer is Fredia who used to be married to Frank (my old desktop) but Frank passed away a couple years back. But my car…

My car is Mama because it was my mom’s car and when I was driving across country to move west she was really fighting to get up those hills. It just felt right to encourage her,”Come on, Mama!” Mama is a 1998 Ford Embarrassment. I rarely wash her, with this smog and that ol’ girl, what’s the point? I never know what time it is because in order to get the heat to work one day I punched her in her sweet spot a little too hard and the clock and the radio stations spun out of control. Manual windows and locks, it’s also a gamble every time I try to start her. And there is a Michigan State Dance Team sticker on the rear window that’s peeling from sun exposure. I can’t bring myself to try to get it off completely because if I ever get pulled over or rear ended, you wouldn’t want to make a dance team girl cry, now would you?

I’m pretty embarrassed by her, especially when I go to valet. I profusely apologize or search endlessly for street parking just to avoid the shame. But what are you going to do? The dream car is a black BMW hard top convertible, who I will name Xavier. Till that day, Mama’s doing a great job getting me from point A to point B (although Mister Red refuses to drive her, and she wouldn’t stand a chance on trips longer than 2 hours).

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