“In A Relationship”

October 2, 2012 § Leave a comment

In retort to the accusations published last week by my prettier half, I was never denying our relationship. There are some things I believe should remain private and who I am doing it with is one of them. Half of my friendships on FB came out of blind curiosity of who they ended up with and the other half are my real friends who know I’ve been dating Mister Red for almost 2 years. I just don’t think I should have to disclose that to every single peeping tom who visits my page. Once you do that, everyone has an opinion about it. And we all know opinions are like assholes. I’ve been through a break up where I had to switch the status back to single…. everyone had an opinion about that too. However, my sources indicate that I am not breaking up with this guy, but opinions stink anyway.

Following Mister Red’s letter last week, several nagging points and a couple of days to realize he requested we be “in a relationship” 6 months ago, I went ahead ripped the band-aid off and confirmed our love digitally. I tooted my horn for all the social network to hear.

Much to my surprise it was as if Facebook threw a parade in our honor. A very large banner splayed out across my timeline for all to discover the moment I became joined with Mister Red on a dot com. Literally, his profile picture took over my page. Handsome as he is, this was most unnecessary. As was the outpour of commenters, both direct and indirect.

For those who know us, they are aware of our relationship. We live together, damn it. One bed, and neither one of us complains of having to sleep on the couch, so you do the math. Moving on… there were a lot of snickers and a lot of ‘likes’ among the spectators of said internet parade. Then there were the nosey people who don’t know me, thinking that I earnestly just started dating this dude a few days ago. However, they too had all nice things to say… yet it just seemed silly. I guess it was old news to me.

Then there were indirect commenters. Those who discuss Facebook sightings behind one’s back. Oh hush up, we all do it, myself included. Which was the exact reason I was trying to avoid volunteering information to a social population. I like to live off the grid. I want an air of mystery. I also don’t like to answer to my relatives why I haven’t married the poor fellow yet. Which is what surfaced from those indirect commenters and resulted in an altercation with my mother. She thought we were getting all serious and needed to know the status of the relationship. What? Correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought thats what I just defined?

Awesome. So now my mother, who’s not even on Facebook is totally confused about the intentions of the man I live with. Thanks. So I guess we are really laying it all out there, me and my loving roommate.

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