Gift Giving Competition

December 16, 2014 § Leave a comment

It’s the end of the year and we are all counting our blessings and savings and accomplishments from the year before. The holidays marks a passage of time when we take an inventory of what’s going on and compare it to last year’s numbers.


This will be the 5th Christmas Mister Red and I will exchange gifts and I’m stumped. I usually win the friendly unspoken gift giving competition. I mean, I pretty much always nail the wild card, warm fuzzy, you-shouldn’t-have-but-how-did-you-know gift. With the exception of the too small navy blue twink suit fail of 2012. It looked like he was wearing a pair of Lulu crops around his athletic thighs. But it was the thought that counted that year.



It’s totally true that we try to one up each other. For Valentines Day, we somehow started a strange tradition of making the other a Valentine. The funnier it is, the punier it is, if you rhyme a poem or draw a picture, the more points you get.

For Halloween, its quietly judging the other’s jack-o-lantern. And sometimes I try to micromanage his carving skills (sorry, dude).

Fourth of July is usually when we bring two dishes to pass and mine is better. Except this year, he championed the avocado/greek yogurt chicken salad that I was skeptical of. And now I make it once a month.

He’s lead started gaining in the spring when he threw me for a loop and observed a holiday in uncharted territory. For April Fools, he staged a walk out with my shoes that was quite hilarious. I didn’t have a comeback for that one.

Thanksgiving might be the only holiday where we truly work together. And it’s for the sake of pie.

This year for Christmas, even though my numbers are down due to my ill prepared April Fool’s Day and the Wedding Proposal, I might forfeit anyway. I don’t have a clue what to get him. I know he’s got some good stuff brewing because I gave him major hints and spread the blanket wide on my Pinterest board.

So what do you give to the man you know so well?

Not socks. That’s for sure.

Not a video game, if I want to see him at all next month.

Is this the year I give boudoir pictures? Is that how those happen? I have always wondered how women end up resorting to that. He puts a ring on it, I can’t think of anything to top that gift this year so I do a stop motion burlesque show?

My points are so far down that I might as well save that up for next year. Nudey pics on our first married xmas. Tasteful, of course. Best wife ever. Saving that for later.

So this year… socks it is!



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